笑死人的笑话(一位朋友询问我的态度和高度的关系)

一位朋友询问我的态度和高度的关系，我告诉他：“态度决定高度，高度决定命运。”他听完后，笑着说：“也别穿米色，穿上跟土豆似的。”

我们聊天的时候，我发现他的衣服湿了，于是我好奇地问他是怎么弄的。他说：“闲聊不久，熟人见其衣湿有水渗出，下意识摸之，涼。”

他告诉我：“5.不离不弃全是放屁，海誓山盟全是回Z。”我笑着回应：“也别穿绿色，穿上就限西瓜似的。”

Another friend is always advice me to wake up early and not play online games or eat late night snacks. He says, "就算啥也不穿，也跟一大肉包子似的。"

He also told me, "对自己要狠一点，再狼一点，因为，你要的比别人多，就必须付出得比别人多。"

One day, I went to buy cookies for a friend who was crying. He said he didn't like round cookies and only wanted square ones.

Another friend said, "只有的一条路不能选择——那就是放弃的路；只有一条路不能拒绝——那就是成长的路."

I have one friend who always gives me advice, even though we don't see each other often. He tells me, "天际的一缕幽香,飘荡心灵的点滴芬芳,无论是白天还是晚上,想你会来到你身旁,跟你诉说略详,爱你是我不变的梦想."

Once, a friend of mine was whining about being single. I told him, "别说你是单身狗，狗到你这个年龄已经死了。"

Another friend told me, "别穿**，穿上跟柚子似的；别穿白色，穿上跟卷心菜似的；别穿黑色，穿上跟狗熊似的。"

There was once a man who bought two snowballs and was about to eat them when he saw a familiar face. He quickly hid the snowballs in his clothes.

My niece was sitting on the sofa, eating snacks, and suddenly cried out, "Mom, you老公竟然敢打你，真是太坏了；Dad, you were beaten by a woman, it's so embarrassing?"

My son woke up during the night and cried loudly. My wife and I got up and tried to comfort him.

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